The Sirius Project Forums are an online peer support community for people who are trying to overcome self-harm. We exist so that people in this situation can offer support to one another, and share ideas and resources that have helped them. We don't just focus on simply stopping self-harm, but on finding alternative ways to cope, and on tackling the issues that caused or lead up to the self-harm in the first place. If you don't feel ready to stop yet, but you would like to work on these issues, you're very welcome here.
You may find that these forums are different to other self-harm forums you are used to, so please read the following rules carefully.
The forums are intended for:
- people who are trying to recover from self-harm and related mental health issues
- people who are considering working on recovery and who want to find out more (but it is very important you feel able to keep to the rules below)
- people who have already overcome self-harm or related issues, but who still need support, or who want to help others
(If you are a researcher looking for participants, please contact us for permission before registering and posting.)
If you are not interested in overcoming your problems, or in taking steps to help yourself, then these forums may not be the best place for you. We understand that not everyone wants to give up self-harm, and we make no judgements about that - many of us have been there ourselves. However, for the sake of our members who are working on recovery, it is important that the focus of the forums is kept on moving forwards.
These rules apply to posts, blogs, signatures, PMs, the chat room, and to the information in your profile.
Posts About Self-Harm, Suicide and Related Behaviours
Remember this is a community for people who would like to recover from self-harm! All posts about self-harm must be made in this context. This applies to eating disorders, suicide, drug/alcohol abuse and other self-destructive behaviours as well as self-injury.
Do not encourage other members to hurt themselves or others or post anything that shows people how to hurt themselves. Any such posts will be deleted and further action will be taken.
Do not discuss your injuries or methods of harming in detail. It is OK to mention that you've cut/burned/etc, but no detailed descriptions of how you did it, or which conjure up a vivid picture, are allowed. Do not post photos of injuries (photos of yourself which happen to show your scars are OK).
If you have overdosed or are concerned about any of your injuries, you need to seek medical attention. If you need support or information regarding this, please feel free to post (but remember we may not be able to respond immediately). However, if you choose not to seek appropriate medical attention, please do not post about it - it is unfair on other members, who can do nothing to get you this help.
If you're feeling suicidal and want help in getting through it, please do feel free to post and ask for support. However, it is unfair and inappropriate to come onto the site and say you are going to kill yourself - there is nothing anyone can do with a statement like that. For this reason, suicide notes are not allowed and may be deleted.
Likewise, please do not post on the forums or in the chat room and say you are currently self-harming or about to self-harm.
None of us are mental health professionals, and we can only offer support and ideas from the perspective of people who have had similar problems ourselves. We are unable to take 'real life' action to help our members. If you are suicidal or feel in danger of seriously harming yourself, we are here to listen, but we urge you to tell someone in real life how you're feeling or to go to your nearest A&E or ER department.
It is fine to acknowledge that self-harm is a way of coping, or that you get something positive out of it, if this is done with a view to making sense of things and moving forwards. It can be healthy and appropriate to explore the reasons we self-harm and the needs it meets for us!
Many self-harm boards make use of "trigger warnings" to indicate posts which may be triggering or upsetting to others.
At Sirius this isn't a requirement because we recognise that triggers can be very individual. However, if you're posting about something that may be distressing, it's very important you use a clear topic title which indicates what you will be discussing. In practice, many members find that trigger warnings are a convenient way of doing this. When discussing self-harm, eating disorders, suicidal feelings, etc, it is essential that you keep to the rules above.
All members, moderators and admins must behave at all times with respect and honesty. Please post and reply to posts in a responsible, adult manner. If you have a disagreement with someone on the board, please discuss it maturely or through email. Threads that get heated will be locked and further action will be taken if necessary.
If you provide any health or medical information in your posts, please include references, e.g. a link to the source. The same goes if you are making a claim about a treatment, product or service. If you are only referring to your personal experience, please make this clear. Any information you provide must be true and correct to the best of your knowledge.
Safety and Privacy
Please respect others members' privacy at all times. Do not share anything you read here off the board, and don't share anything in private forums or password-protected blogs with members who don't have access to those areas. PMs should be kept private unless you believe they break the guidelines (in which case you should use the "report" button). If you need support or advice from non-members regarding something that's happened here, that's fine, but please don't reveal any identifying details. Anyone who fails to respect others' privacy will be banned.
If you are a friend, family member or carer of someone who posts here, you must declare this and make sure you have their full permission to visit the board. Failure to do so will result in you being asked to leave and you may be banned. Many of us use these boards to work through painful feelings we might not feel comfortable sharing with those who know us in real life. If you need support as a friend or family member, take a look at our Friends & Family page for alternative sources of support. Joining the forums for the sole purpose of 'keeping an eye on' members you know from somewhere else is not allowed.
Please use your common sense when following links posted by other members. Remember that anyone can post on Sirius as long as they register. Our moderators and admins will remove any links which are obviously inappropriate, but we cannot thoroughly vet every site linked to. The fact that a link, self help idea, or other resource is posted on the boards does not mean it has been approved or recommended by Sirius Project in any way.
Be cautious when revealing personal details such as contact information. Any addresses or phone numbers will be removed from posts. Members under 16 are advised not to post any contact details (including email address/IM), their full name or photos of themselves.
Spam and Advertising
Spam is not permitted and all spammers will be banned. Genuine forum members (i.e. those who have also posted about other topics) are allowed to post links to their own websites, organisations, etc. However, if your only reason for coming here is to post about your own mental-health-related resource, please contact an admin for permission first.
What if someone breaks the rules?
Underneath every post and PM there's a small button with an exclamation mark on it. Click on this to flag the post up to the mods and admins. If the problem's urgent, please PM or email one of us as well. If the problem's with something other than a post (e.g. someone's profile or the chat room) you'll need to PM or email us.
Please see the FAQ for details of what happens when someone breaks the rules.
We are here to:
- support each other
- share ideas and resources that may help
- set goals and cheer each other on
- talk about how we feel and be heard
- talk about practical problems in our lives and find ways forward
We are not here to:
- replace professional help or provide a crisis service
- share methods of harming (this includes eating disorders, suicide attempts and other self-destructive behaviours)
- trigger one another with graphic descriptions
- use how badly we've harmed to show how awful we feel, how ill we are or how serious our problems are (we would encourage you to talk about these things directly)